If you're old enough to drive...

08.31.06

My daughter drives a Jeep.  It’s a purple and pink Barbie-Wrangler.  2-speed: forward and reverse.  It even has a radio that plays all Barbie, all the time. She is one stylin’ 3 year old, let me tell you.

 

The thing is, I always wanted a Jeep.  When I was a teen-ager my Dad said, “They’re too tippy.”  When I met my husband and told him the next car I got should be a Jeep he said,  “They’re top heavy.  They tend to fall right over.  The way you drive?  No.”  And it’s never even been open for discussion.

 

So I think I’m suffering from a bit of “Jeep Envy.”

 

She just looks so incredibly cool and carefree as she gets in, fastens her seat-belt, fastens her baby’s seat belt, and drives away 4 feet before she runs into the lawn chair.  Or the dog. Or the swing set.  She actually spends a considerable amount of time trying to drive up the slide.

 

“Dang,” says my husband watching, “she drives just like her mother.”

 

Ahem.  Thanks.

 

Let’s not talk about my driving.

 

You don’t see him taking away her Jeep. 

 

This kid is spoiled in so many, many ways.  Sometimes I think we’re the ultimate “mush” parents and we’re going to end up raising a sociopath.  So many things are a battle with her and it takes an incredible amount of energy to win all the time.  Energy that I don’t have.  So things slide.  She watches an extra move, she goes to bed an hour too late, she eats a whole lot of macaroni and cheese.  And… she’s past three and not potty trained.  And that one’s about to end.

 

Tomorrow begins the great (and late) battle of the diaper.  She knows everything there is to know about the potty.  She’s used it for a whole day, and she watches and coaches and explains to other kids how to do it.  She wake up dry if I don’t let her drink an extra glass of water at bedtime.  It’s all done except for the shouting.

 

And the kicking, screaming, knock-down drag-out, furniture-tossing fury.  But I’m armed and ready.  I figure the carpet needs a good cleaning anyway, so let’s just do it.  She might be stubborn and obstinate, but I can be more so.  She might be louder than me, but I’m pretty good at ignoring tantrums.  Besides, we’re almost out of diapers and I have lots of big girl panties.  The ones she picked out herself.

 

Bring it on, Sweetheart, ‘cause Mommy’s ready to win.

 

Here’s my strategy:  No diapers.  One way or another we are going to get through the day without diapers.  And if that means she has to carry a plastic bag around to sit on then so be it.  And if that means she screams all day, tough.  Mom’s gonna win on this one and there’s no alternative. 

 

Now I’m going to prepare by pulling the spot-lifter out of the closet, the ear plugs out of the medicine cabinet, and settle down for a full night’s sleep.  I figure it this way, if she gets a Jeep, then I get a kid who uses the potty.

 

I’ll let you know how it goes.